


Super High School Level Chat Room

by ladysaxobeat



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types
Genre: Fuck Canon, chat fic, jin kirigiri/tanaki togami is the only togiri that matters
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-14
Updated: 2020-08-30
Packaged: 2020-10-18 14:51:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 4,888
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20640983
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ladysaxobeat/pseuds/ladysaxobeat
Summary: Makoto creates a chat room. At 8 am in the morning. Most of his classmates are displeased.





	1. Makoto Creates A Chat Room

**Author's Note:**

> Taka: 8 am is the perfect time to wake up!  
Kyoko: absolutely not.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eggluck - Makoto  
ItsAMystery - Kyoko  
TheRulebook - Taka  
Melody - Sayaka  
souljagal - Mukuro  
cmptrchld - Chihiro  
crazymondo - Mondo  
Pitch - Leon  
whoruwearing?! - Junko  
sweetswimmer - Aoi  
Otaku - Hifumi  
I've Read Books - Toko  
Garnet - Sakura  
lmao - Hiro  
QueenOfLiars/goffikraevn - Celeste  
Richie Rich/Actually Five Hargreeves - Byakuya

** _Eggluck _ ** _ started a new chat room. _

** _Eggluck_ ** _ added 16 people to their chat room. _

** _Eggluck_ ** _ changed the name of the chat room to _ ** _Super High School Level Chat Room_ ** _ . _

**Eggluck: **hey guys

**ItsAMystery: **makoto

**ItsAMystery: **it is eight in the morning

**Eggluck:** yes

**ItsAMystery:** why are you up?

**TheRulebook:** Kyoko! 8 AM is the optimal time to wake up officially!

**Melody:** taka its the wknd -_-

**Melody: **and i agree with kyoko

**Melody:** y r u up makoto 0_o

**Eggluck: **eh

**Eggluck: **i’ve always been an early riser

**souljagal**: some people are not

**souljagal:** you should be mindful so as not to disturb others’ rest

**TheRulebook:** As I stated before, they should already have risen.

**cmptrchld: **taka…

**crazymondo: **bro, why the FUCK are you being so loud

**TheRulebook: **Bro!

**TheRulebook: **Your language!!

**crazymondo: **nah, bro, its 8 am

**Pitch: **what the hell???

**Pitch: **u guys are blowing up my phone

**Melody: **its makotos fault :/

**Eggluck: **sayaka!

**Melody: **it is :P

**whoruwearing?!: **rip makoto naegi

**whoruwearing?!: **also, oof, muku got here before me

**whoruwearing?!: **anyway, who all r up???

**TheRulebook:** So far, we’ve seen Makoto, Kyoko, me, Sayaka, Mukuro, Chihiro, Mondo, Leon and now you, Junko.

**sweetswimmer: **Hey guys!!!

**Eggluck: **hey hina!!

**sweetswimmer: **I just got back from a morning jog with Sakura when I got the notif for a chat room

**sweetswimmer: **I love the name, btw!

**Eggluck: **thanks, just got it

**cmptrchld: **hi officially!

**cmptrchld: **i just got done eating

**Melody: **oooo whatd u have :?

**cmptrchld: **just some cereal

**Eggluck: **oh i should probably get something to eat too

**TheRulebook: **Makoto! 

**TheRulebook: **Eating breakfast is the first thing you should do when you wake up!

**TheRulebook: **What else have you been doing?

**Eggluck: **laying down

**Eggluck: **i don’t wanna wake up my parents

**Melody: **u might as well :)

**Melody: **more ppl will prob be up by then ;)

**Eggluck: **yeah yeah

* * *

**whatruwearing?!: **whoo!! awake time!!

**sweetswimmer: **It’s almost ten

**whatruwearing?!: **yeah, on a saturday

**crazymondo: **jeez, even i get up earlier than that

**Otaku: **ha! it seems im not the only one.

**Otaku: **miss enoshima is also a late weekend riser!

**Pitch: **u think thats late??

**Pitch: **talk to celeste and togami

**I’ve Read Books: **Master’s here??

**Pitch: **hey toko

**Pitch: **no togamis prob still sleeping

**whatruwearing?!: **it’s not even 11 yet

**Eggluck: **oh hey mondo hifumi and toko

**Eggluck: **good morning

**crazymondo: **dude, what the hell would make you start a chat room

**crazymondo: **when everyone is fucking asleep

**Eggluck: **wasn’t tired

**ItsAMystery:** apparently

**Eggluck: **kyoko’s up

**ItsAMystery: **yep

**I’ve Read Books: **what’d you make a chat room for anyway, Naegi??

**Eggluck: **why not

**Eggluck: **we’re all friends

**Eggluck: **we should keep in touch

**Melody: **soff

**Garnet:** He sure is.

**sweetswimmer:** SAKURA!!!

**sweetswimmer:** HEY!!!

**Garnet:** Hello, Hina.

**lmao:** ayy chat room

**I’ve Read Books:** oh, great.

**I’ve Read Books: **he’s here.

**lmao: **hey!!

**Eggluck: **toko, don’t be rude

**Eggluck: **please

**QueenOfLiars: **Hello, all.

**Eggluck:** hey celeste

**QueenOfLiars: **Makoto.

**QueenOfLiars: **I had to turn my phone on silent because of you.

**QueenOfLiars:** Were you aware of the god awful hour you started this chat room at?

**Eggluck:** heh, uh, sorry

**QueenOfLiars:** It is whatever now.

**QueenOfLiars: **My sleep was not disturbed greatly.

**QueenOfLiars: **Be thankful for that.

**ItsAMystery:** calm down celeste

**ItsAMystery:** makoto apologized, i’m sure he won’t do it again

**ItsAMystery:** right, makoto

**Eggluck: **er, right

**Melody:** oof

**sweetswimmer:** oof

**Pitch:** oof

**cmptrchld:** oof

**Eggluck: **et tu, chihiro

**Melody:** chihiros on the dark side now ;P

**TheRulebook: **What is this I’m hearing about a “dark side”?

**whoruwearing?!:** i was also summoned

**crazymondo: **chill out, its a joke

**cmptrchld: **yeah, i’m still pure

**Richie Rich:** what the hell is this?

**whoruwearing?!:** gang’s all here!!!

**Richie Rich: **naegi, i know you’re behind this.

**Eggluck:** i couldn’t sleep

**Richie Rich:** so you decided to wake everyone else up.

**Eggluck: **i wasn’t trying to

**ItsAMystery:** doesn’t change the fact that you did

**whoruwearing?!: **Tag Team The Bitch

**TheRulebook:** Junko! Language!

**whoruwearing?!: **uwaah, you’re yelling at me!!!

**whoruwearing?!: **muku-chan, save me!!!

**souljagal:** junko…

**whoruwearing?!**: muku-chan…

**Richie Rich:** anyway.

**Richie Rich: **naegi, why is this a thing?

**Eggluck:** why not

**Richie Rich:** that does not answer my question, makoto.

**Eggluck:** oh no, my actual name

**Eggluck:** okay, fine

**Eggluck:** i made it so we can stay in touch outside of class

**Melody:** aww that’s super nice mako ^_^

**TheRulebook:** I agree. What an excellent idea, Makoto.

**TheRulebook:** I’m ashamed that I hadn’t thought of it earlier!

**whoruwearing?!:** yea, thats a lit idea, koto!!!

**souljagal:** i agree

**ItsAMystery:** as do i

**Pitch:** still not jazzed about bein woken up so early but

**Pitch:** good shit

**Richie Rich:** i suppose it is a good idea.

**Richie Rich:** but i will be putting you all on do not disturb from 12am to 11am on weekends.

**Eggluck:** byakuya, you should really get to sleep earlier than that

**Richie Rich:** makoto.

**Eggluck:** yes

**Richie Rich:** shut up

**lmao:** oof

**whoruwearing?!:** shut down

**Otaku:** rip

**Eggluck:** come on guys

**Pitch:** you did it to yourself dude

* * *

**goffikraevn:** You really go to bed at midnight, Byakuya?

**goffikraevn:** Even I go to bed much earlier than that, at 10pm.

**goffikraevn:** But, such is the life of a businessman, I assume?

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** no, i just don’t sleep.

**goffikraevn:** Oh, I see.

**goffikraevn:** You are a vampire.

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** Holy Shit, Celeste, Fucking Do Not.

**goffikraevn:** I believe that I just did.

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** Celeste!


	2. A Wild Komaru Naegi Appears

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Komaru has entered the chat.  
Komaru: chaos time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> another chapter in one day??? whomst????
> 
> Eggluck - Makoto  
ItsAMystery - Kyoko  
TheRulebook - Taka  
Melody - Sayaka  
souljagal - Mukuro  
cmptrchld - Chihiro  
crazymondo - Mondo  
Pitch - Leon  
whoruwearing?! - Junko  
sweetswimmer - Aoi  
Otaku - Hifumi  
I've Read Books - Toko  
Garnet - Sakura  
lmao - Hiro  
QueenOfLiars/goffikraevn - Celeste  
Richie Rich/Actually Five Hargreeves - Byakuya  
BabyEgg - Komaru

_ The next afternoon… _

**cmptrchld:** hey, uh

**cmptrchld:** this chat’s not dead, is it

**Eggluck:** i don’t think so

**Eggluck:** why

**cmptrchld:** oh, it’s just been really quiet today

**cmptrchld:** i was going to talk more yesterday, but chiaki needed my help with beating undyne

**cmptrchld:** sorry

**Eggluck:** don’t be, it’s okay

**whoruwearing?!:** OH MY GAWD, BABY HIRO PLAYS UNDERTALE???? WHAT????

**cmptrchld:** yeah, kinda

**whoruwearing?!:** omg, you know what???

**whoruwearing?!:** i actually have a friend who LOVES undertale

**whoruwearing?!:** you wanna talk to him???

**cmptrchld:** i have a feeling i know who you’re talking about

**cmptrchld:** no thank you

**whoruwearing?!:** that’s very understandable, have a nice day

**souljagal:** wow

**souljagal:** i believe that’s the least chaotic thing you’ve done all day

**Eggluck:** you think your sis is chaotic

**souljagal:** i mean

**souljagal:** i live with her, so…

**Eggluck:** well, i also live with my sister

**Eggluck:** she’s way more chaotic, trust me

**whoruwearing?!:** **_oh????_**

**whoruwearing?!:** you must introduce me to her immediately

**Eggluck:** i mean, she’s kinda watching anime right now…

**whoruwearing?!:** Add The Younger Naegi To The Chat This Instant, Peasant.

**Eggluck:** okay okay

**_Eggluck _**_added _**_BabyEgg_** _to _**_Super High School Level Chat Room_**_._

**Eggluck:** there

**BabyEgg:** what the heck is this??

**whoruwearing?!:** oh what an adowable usewname!! ^_^

**whoruwearing?!:** i love younger naegi already

**BabyEgg:** okay, one, i already have a name, its komaru

**BabyEgg:** two, did you on god just use uwu speech

**Otaku:** oh, mr. naegi, i had no idea you had a sister.

**Otaku:** what anime were you watching, miss naegi?

**BabyEgg:** im rewatching tokyo ghoul

**Otaku:** hmm, not bad, not bad at all…

**Otaku:** have you started anything recently?

**BabyEgg:** my hero academia and a zombie idol show that i forgot the name of

**Otaku:** Zombie Land Saga, perhaps?

**BabyEgg:** that’s the bitch

**QueenOfLiars:** Makoto Naegi.

**QueenOfLiars:** Have you any idea of the hell you have just wrought?

**Eggluck:** sorry, i didn’t hear you

**Eggluck:** i’m still reeling from the fact that

**Eggluck:** KOMARU DID YOU DEADASS JUST CURSE

**BabyEgg:** you also cursed

**Eggluck:** no, mom said ass wasn’t a curse word

**Eggluck:** and you know what else mom said

**BabyEgg:** what did she say makoto

**Eggluck:** she said, and i quote

**Eggluck:** “Komaru Naegi, you are not allowed to curse until you are 16 years old.”

**Eggluck:** and last time i checked

**Eggluck:** you are fifteen

**Pitch:** damn

**Pitch:** makoto went off

**crazymondo:** my big bro used to do the same to me, holy shit

**Richie Rich:** what the hell is happening here?

**ItsAMystery:** makoto added his sister and things immediately went to hell

**souljagal:** couldn’t have said it better myself

**Richie Rich:** i didn’t know makoto had siblings.

**Richie Rich:** i suppose this is one way to meet the family.

**sweetswimmer:** wait what

**BabyEgg:** okay but seriously i know none of you

**sweetswimmer:** guys hold on

**Eggluck:** i’d totally tell you, but you cursed, so i’m not gonna

**BabyEgg:** mature

**sweetswimmer:** guys

**whoruwearing?!:** i still can’t believe makoto went off like that, holy shit

**whoruwearing?!:** never knew ya had it in ya, dude

**Pitch:** thats what im sayin

**cmptrchld:** guys, i think hina’s trying to say something

**sweetswimmer:** i am

**sweetswimmer:** something important

**Garnet:** I am quite interested in hearing this “something”.

**Melody:** me too :D

**TheRulebook:** Go ahead, Hina. We are listening.

**sweetswimmer:** finally

**sweetswimmer:** okay so

**sweetswimmer:** after komaru showed up and introduced herself, byakuya was all

**sweetswimmer:** “oh, i didn’t know makoto had siblings”

**sweetswimmer:** and then he said that it was one way to meet the family

**sweetswimmer:** GUYS I THINK BYAKUYA AND MAKOTO ARE DATING

**QueenOfLiars:** Oh, Hina.

**QueenOfLiars:** You really are ridiculous sometimes, you know?

**sweetswimmer:** come on celeste

**sweetswimmer:** they totally are

**sweetswimmer:** i even gave proof

**QueenOfLiars:** Barely.

**ItsAMystery:** actually

**ItsAMystery:** it’s not a bad idea

**QueenOfLiars:** Kyoko, do be serious.

**ItsAMystery:** i am

**ItsAMystery:** what byakuya said is very suspicious

**ItsAMystery:** not to mention he also called makoto by his given name

**ItsAMystery:** something he doesn’t even do with you

**QueenOfLiars:** I’ve never once heard him refer to me as “Ludenberg”.

**ItsAMystery:** we all know that’s not your real name

**ItsAMystery:** but i digress

**ItsAMystery:** hina’s idea holds some merit

**ItsAMystery:** i will be sure to look into it

**sweetswimmer:** HA!

**sweetswimmer:** take that celeste

**QueenOfLiars:** Whatever.

**QueenOfLiars:** Do not come whining to me when it turns out that your insipid little fantasies turn out to be just that.

**whoruwearing?!:** why are you so sure that byakuya and makoto aren’t dating???

**whoruwearing?!:** does the little goth lolita have a crush on richie rich???

**QueenOfLiars:** I am a lesbian.

**lmao:** lol rip

**whoruwearing?!:** god, i can’t believe how outta the damn loop i am

**BabyEgg:** can you guys please tell me who you are

**Melody:** im sayaka maizono :)

**BabyEgg:** wait on god

**Melody:** yep

**BabyEgg:** thats so lit omg

**BabyEgg:** im talking to THE sayaka maizono

**I’ve Read Books:** you naegis are the same

**I’ve Read Books:** so easily impressed by some popular girl with zero brains

**Melody:** rude!! >:(

**TheRulebook:** Toko, you really shouldn’t belittle your classmates in such a manner.

**TheRulebook:** Apologize this instant!

**I’ve Read Books:** fine

**I’ve Read Books:** sorry

**Melody:** i forgive u :)

**BabyEgg:** wait

**BabyEgg:** toko

**BabyEgg:** as in toko fukawa

**I’ve Read Books:** what do you care

**BabyEgg:** i love your books so much

**I’ve Read Books:** yeah right

**BabyEgg:** no seriously

**BabyEgg:** ive read so lingers the ocean so many times

**BabyEgg:** its my fav book of yours

**BabyEgg:** toko

**BabyEgg:** are you still there

**Pitch:** welp

**Otaku:** oof

**lmao:** rip

* * *

**KoKo:** makoto i think i broke one of your friends

**Koto:** oh, is someone talking to me

**Koto:** i can’t hear them

**KoKo:** oh my god

**KoKo:** I, Komaru Naegi, formally apologize for saying a curse word in front of other people. I was very out of line when I did so. There are other, more proper words for people under sixteen to use to express their feelings, and I will use them from here on out. 

**KoKo:** are you happy now

**Koto:** you could’ve just said sorry

**Koto:** i’m not mom

**KoKo:** youre acting like her

**KoKo:** anyway back to the actual issue

**Koto:** no, i heard you

**Koto:** don’t worry too much

**Koto:** toko’s not good with compliments

**Koto:** she’ll be back on soon

**Koko:** if youre sure

* * *

**Double Date!!**

**A Whole Lesbian:** You’re a fucking idiot.

**Rich Gay:** shut up celeste.

**Lawful Bi:** no, she’s right

**Lawful Bi:** you’re an idiot

**Bisaster:** come on, guys, leave him alone

**Rich Gay:** thank you makoto.

**Bisaster:** he can’t help it if he’s too gay to function

**Rich Gay:** nevermind, fuck you makoto.

**Bisaster:** i’m right

**Rich Gay:** but you shouldn’t say it.

**A Whole Lesbian:** He has every right to.

**A Whole Lesbian:** Because you are, in fact, too gay to function.

**Lawful Bi:** you now have to make that your username

**Rich Gay:** are you serious right now?

**Bisaster:** it’s the rules

**Rich Gay:** oh my god.

**_Rich Gay_** _changed their username to _**_Too Gay To Function_**_._

**Too Gay To Function:** this is bullying.

**Too Gay To Function:** anyway, you better not out me before i’m ready, kirigiri.

**Lawful Bi: **aren’t you already out

**Eggluck:** he means our relationship

**A Whole Lesbian:** Coward.

**Too Gay To Function:** choke and also die.

**A Whole Lesbian:** You wish I could die.

**Too Gay To Function:** i very much do.

**Lawful Bi:** behave

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> when you expose yourself, so you have to pay the price.


	3. Jin Is Dating Someone||Togami Sibs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in which I singlehandedly destroy canon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> why are there so many american references in this fic about japanese kids

_ Later that night… _

**whoruwearing?!:** okay, kyoko’s offline and byakuya’s on dnd

**whoruwearing?!:** gossip time

**BabyEgg:** who

**Eggluck:** kyoko is itsamystery and byakuya is richie rich

**whoruwearing?!:** shut your hecks, i have news

**souljagal:** is this about the thing you were yelling at me about earlier

**whoruwearing?!:** duh

**whoruwearing?!:** okay, so

**whoruwearing?!:** i snuck into school to get something for my best boy, right??

**whoruwearing?!:** and on my way out, who do i see in the caf but

**whoruwearing?!:** headmaster jin-jin and some blond dude

**whoruwearing?!:** im about to keep on my merry way, bc i dont wanna get fucking caught

**whoruwearing?!:** but my brain is all “junko doesn’t that blond guy look fucking familiar????”

**whoruwearing?!:** so i take another quick look and

**whoruwearing?!:** ITS TANAKI MOTHERFUCKING TOGAMI

**Pitch:** wait like

**PItch:** on god

**whoruwearing?!:** on god on god

**whoruwearing?!:** oh and ya know what fucking else

**whoruwearing?!:** jin said something to him and TANAKI LAUGHED

**whoruwearing?!:** like head tilted back, full sound laughter

**whoruwearing?!:** anyway, dad kirigiri and dad togami are dating

**Pitch:** oh my god

**crazymondo:** holy shit

**Melody:** aww he made him laugh UwU

**cmptrchld:** mondo and taka do the same

**cmptrchld:** they’re totally dating

**crazymondo:** chis right thats super gay

**crazymondo:** i should know

**BabyEgg:** oh lit everyone’s lgbt

**Skissors:** oh hey big mac made a chat room lit

**Eggluck:** oh, hey jill

**Skissors:** now whats this im hearing about gay

**whoruwearing?!:** dad kirigiri and dad togami are dating

**Skissors:** _oh deadass_

**whoruwearing?!:** deadass, i saw it with my own eyes

**Skissors:** damn wait til sherlock and white knight hear this

**whatruwearing?!:** DON’T YOU DARE TELL THEM I’LL EXECUTE YOU

**Skissors:** bold of you to assume i can die

**Skissors:** anyway yeah i wont tell

**Eggluck:** why can’t we tell them

**whoruwearing?!:** bc i want them to find out on their own

**whoruwearing?!:** i wanna see their faces when the realization sets in

**Skissors:** ha i like the way you think

**souljagal:** oh god they’re agreeing on things

**souljagal:** someone help

* * *

Togami Time

**Guns & Gays:** hi its stanning mean girls time

**_Guns & Gays_** _changed their name to _**_irl damian hubbard_**_._

**TiredMom** **TM** **:** does that make me gretchen weiners??

**cookin’ by the book:** no way shi, you’re totally that math teacher

**bway veruca salt:** ms. norbury

**cookin’ by the book:** there it is

**TiredMom** **TM** **:** okay, yeah, you’re right.

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** i refuse to change my extremely accurate username.

**irl damian hubbard:** look, as long as you agree to stan mean girls, idgaf

**an actual ghost:** Deadass, tho, literally everyone in this household does

**Doctor Stranger:** You’re right and you should say it.

**Morticia Addams:** Hanaki, Bi-Hou and Vanji, please go to bed.

**Morticia Addams:** My room is right next to the music room and I’m trying to sleep.

**Wednesday Addams:** My apologies, Daina. I just wrote a new musical piece and I wanted Hanaki to try it out.

**irl regina george:** yeah, then vanji came in and wanted me to play broadway tunes

**actually vanya hargreeves:** please don’t pin things on me i’m baby

**cloak and dagger:** no, that’s byakuya.

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** do not.

**NERD!!:** absolutely right

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** no.

**on your left:** A Baby!!

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** Cease.

**cloak and dagger:** nah.

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** i am being bullied.

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** shinobu, make them stop bullying me.

**TiredMom** **TM** **:** guys, don’t bully byakuya.

**irl regina george:** but its fun

**TiredMom****TM****:** _disappointed mom stare_

**irl regina george:** okay okay sorry geez

**cookin’ by the book:** suzu, i love how you’re claiming to be damian hubbard even tho he’s never touched a gun in his life

**irl damian hubbard:** Are You Sure About That???

**cookin’ by the book:** absolutely valid response, thank you

**Morticia Addams:** Guys, please go to sleep.

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** gross, no thank you.

**bway veruca salt:** ^^^

**TiredMom** **TM** **:** what’s that?? never heard of it.

**an actual ghost:** sleep? idk her

**irl damian hubbard:** sleep?? idk about sleep its summertime

**actually vanya hargreeves:** you better go to bed

**irl damian hubbard:** aw she caught me

**on your left:** nice try daina

**cloak and dagger:** better luck next time

**Morticia Addams:** _Untitled intensifies._

**cookin’ by the book:** HOW COULD THIS HAPPEN TO ME

**Doctor Stranger:** I MADE MY MISTAKE   
**cloak and dagger:** GOT NOWHERE TO RUN

**an actual ghost:** THE NIGHT GOES ON AS IM FADING AWAY

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** I’M SICK OF THIS LIFE

**TiredMom** **TM** **:** I JUST WANNA SCREAM

**bway veruca salt:** HOW COULD THIS HAPPEN TO ME

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** chie, literally what the hell do you have to be emo about??

**bway veruca salt:** i didnt wanna be left out

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** valid reason, carry on.

**irl regina george:** better question

**irl regina george:** why are you being emo, zenj

**cookin’ by the book:** i don’t feel comfortable disclosing that

**Wednesday Addams:** You are valid, brother.

**cookin’ by the book:** thanks bi-hou

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** Oh, Wait, Fuck.

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** I Almost Forgot About My Crisis.

**irl damian hubbard:** oh fuck what happened???

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** i almost outted my relationship in front of my classmates.

**bway veruca salt:** oh god oh fuck

**actually vanya hargreeves:** do they suspect

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** they most definitely suspect.

**an actual ghost:** rip byakuya

**irl damian hubbard:** guys, put an f in the chat

**NERDS!!:** f

**an actual ghost:** f

**bway veruca salt:** f

**actually vanya hargreeves:** f

**cookin’ by the book:** f

**cloak and dagger:** f

**Doctor Stranger:** Is it really that bad, though?

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** Um, Yes, It Is, Though???

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** My Reputation Is At Stake, Masato.

**irl damian hubbard:** yea masato

**irl damian hubbard:** his rep

**Doctor Stranger:** You’re absolutely right, I’m sorry.

**irl regina george:** i think its a good thing

**irl regina george:** maybe we’ll finally get to meet your mystery beau

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** i’m not ready yet.

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** and i don’t want to unleash all of you upon him.

**irl damian hubbard:** its not like we’re gonna kill the guy

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** says the ultimate hitman.

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** look, i promise you guys will know before my classmates.

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** we’ll continue this talk in the morning.

**TiredMom** **TM** **:** please go to sleep before midnight tomorrow

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** I Can Not Hear You, I Am Sleeping Too Loud.

**bway veruca salt:** worth a try

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guns & Gays/irl damian hubbard - Suzuhiko Togami, Ultimate Hitman  
TiredMomTM - Shinobu Togami, Ultimate Secretary  
cookin' by the book - Zenji Togami, Ultimate Baker  
bway veruca salt - Chie Togami, Ultimate Ballerina  
an actual ghost - Mei-Suki Togami, Ultimate Spy  
Doctor Stranger - Masato Togami, Ultimate Doctor  
Morticia Addams - Daina Togami, Ultimate Marine Biologist  
Wednesday Addams - Bi-Hou Togami, Ultimate Composer  
irl regina george - Hanaki Togami, Ultimate Pianist  
actually vanya hargreeves - Vanji Togami, Ultimate Vocalist  
cloak and dagger - Yuka Togami, Ultimate Knife Wielder  
NERD!! - Sou Togami, Ultimate Computer Scientist  
on your left - Akira Togami, Ultimate Tennis Player


	4. Class 77

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this chapter was so damn hard to write, ew

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> g4m3g1rl - Chiaki  
sharkboi - Kazuichi  
talent?? i don't know her - Hajime  
Not Fucking Boss Baby - Fuyuhiko  
crybaby by melanie martinez - Mikan  
Baby Regina George - Hiyoko  
mom - Akane  
HopeRat - Nagito  
say cheese motherfuckers - Mahiru  
crunchity munchity - Teruteru  
punk rock - Ibuki  
swords - Peko  
Princess - Sonia  
Whomst - Imposter  
The Leader - Nekomaru  
Not A Furry - Gundham

**_g4m3g1rl_** _started a new chat room._

**_g4m3g1rl_** _added 15 people to their chat room._

** _g4m3g1rl_ ** _ changed the name of their chat room to _ ** _M3M35 4ND 0TH3R 5H1T_ ** _ . _

**sharkboi:** accurate name

**g4m3g1rl:** 1 kn0w

**talent?? i don’t know her:** Hey, what the fuck is this?

**Not Fucking Boss Baby:** a chat room, babe, what’s it look like

**talent?? i don’t know her:** Oh, hey, Fuyu. How’s your eye?

**Not Fucking Boss Baby:** it’s fine, babe

**Not Fucking Boss Baby:** mikan does good work

**crybaby by melanie martinez:** uwu

**Baby Regina George:** what the entire fuck is your name???

**g4m3g1rl:** 4m4z1ng

**crybaby by melanie martinez:** 0/////0

**mom:** Hiyoko, don’t.

**Baby Regina George:** i just asked a fucking question

**HopeRat**: yeah she just asked a fucking question

**talent?? i don’t know her:** Oh my fucking God…

**mom:** Nagito, please.

**HopeRat:** i havent even done anything yet

**talent?? i don’t know her:** Yet.

**say cheese motherfuckers:** ban nagito 2019

**Baby Regina George:** ooh let him know sis

**HopeRat:** @mom i’m being bullied

**mom:** Okay.

**crunchity munchity:** damn

**punk rock:** get fucked

**_g4m3g1rl_** _changed the name of their chat room to _**_Everyone Bully Nagito_**_._

**HopeRat:** im feeling very appreciated in this chilis tonight

**say cheese motherfuckers:** as you should

**swords:** I seemed to have walked in on a disaster.

**Not Fucking Boss Baby:** sup peko

**swords:** Young Master.

**Not Fucking Boss Baby:** nope, we talked about this

**swords:** Yes, of course.

**swords:** Fuyuhiko.

**Not Fucking Boss Baby:** there it is

**talent?? i don’t know her:** Soft.

**Princess:** hello all!!

**sharkboi: **hey sonia

**say cheese motherfuckers**: what, no ‘miss’

**sharkboi:** i can be mature

**Princess:** i guess i never miss, huh???

**Not Fucking Boss Baby:** SONIA

**Princess:** yes?? uwu

**Not Fucking Boss Baby:** don’t fucking make me get togami

**whomst: **hmm?

**Not Fucking Boss Baby:** not you, the real togami

**whomst:** i am the real togami???

**Not Fucking Boss Baby:** nope, i’m not fucking doing this today

**Baby Regina George:** didnt kuya literally send a hitman after you???

**Baby Regina George: **why are you still posing as him

**crunchity munchity:** its their talent, leave them alone

**Baby Regina George:** i mean

**Baby Regina George:** if they wanna fucking die i wont stop them

**The Leader: **Hiyoko, don’t wish death upon people.

**Baby Regina George:** im not

**Baby Regina George:** imposter is wishing death upon themself

**Not A Furry:** What the hell is going on?

**Princess:** imposter has a death wish.

**Not A Furry:** Ah.

**crunchity munchity: **stop bullying them

**Not Fucking Boss Baby:** we are literally not bullying them

**Baby Regina George:** telling the truth is not bullying

**crybaby by melanie martinez:** i don’t think you have much room to talk, hiyoko

**Baby Regina George:** oh my god

**Baby Regina George:** i literally fucking apologized shut up

**mom:** Calm down, Hiyoko.

**Not Fucking Boss Baby:** god, what is wrong with this fucking class

**Baby Regina George:** um excuse you

**Not Fucking Boss Baby:** oh, right, my bad

**Not Fucking Boss Baby:** excluding haji and peko

**Baby Regina George:** UM EXCUSE YOU

**Not Fucking Boss Baby:** i said what the fuck i said

**The Leader:** No fighting.

**HopeRat:** what are you our dad

**The Leader:** The Class DadTM, yes.

**HopeRat:** oh my god


	5. fuck it, i'm not naming these chapters after this

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Byakuya comes out about his relationship with Makoto. Suzuhiko makes a revelation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sonia Addams - Sonia  
Ultimate Bitch Baby - Hiyoko  
Bitch Baby but GUN - Fuyuhiko  
sew me - Haruka Togami  
egg boy - Makoto

**Bitch Baby Inc.**

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** alright, listen up, assholes.

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** and sonia.

**Sonia Addams:** :)

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** i’ve got some news.

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** relationship news.

**Ultimate Bitch Baby:** oh shit????

**goffikraevn:** Oh? You’re actually going to tell people?

**Bitch Baby but GUN:** wait, ludenberg already knows

**goffikraevn:** Of course I know, Fuyuhiko.

**goffikraevn:** We share a class.

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** Shut The Fuck Up Or I Won’t Tell You.

**Sonia Addams:** we’re listening, byakuya.

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** thank you.

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** i’m dating makoto naegi.

**Sonia Addams:** I FUCKING KNEW IT!!!

**Sonia Addams:** CALLED IT MOTHERFUCKERS!!!

**Bitch Baby but GUN:** sonia, holy shit

**Sonia Addams:** GUNDHAM OWES ME FIFTy FUCKING BUCKS!!!

**Ultimate Bitch Baby:** welp i guess i have to take one for the team

**Ultimate Bitch Baby:** wow that’s super valid kuya!!

**Ultimate Bitch Baby:** im glad you told us!!

**Ultimate Bitch Baby:** i hope you two are happy!!

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** thank you hiyoko.

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** we are quite happy together.

**Bitch Baby but GUN:** oh shit, my bad

**Bitch Baby but GUN:** congrats byakuya

**Sonia Addams:** yeah congrats!!!

**Sonia Addams:** it must’ve taken you a while to build up the courage to tell us, and we’re glad you did!!!

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** thank you both.

**Actually Five Hargreeves: **now i have to tell my siblings, and then my class.

**Sonia Addams:** ooh, good luck!!

* * *

**Togami Time**

**sew me:** cannot believe you all had chat without me

**sew me:** i feel so loved

**on your left:** oh no, we did forget you, didn’t we

**on your left:** sorry haruka

**sew me:** there are no worries

**sew me:** i was asleep

**Doctor Stranger:** This is why Haruka and I aren’t speaking currently.

**sew me:** Your Puny Opinions Do Not Concern Me

**sew me:** You Will Eventually Come Crawling When You Require Something Of Me

**sew me:** I Know This For A Fact

**Doctor Stranger:** I won’t, actually, so try again.

**sew me:** You Will

**sew me:** Do Not Underestimate My Judgement, Younger Brother

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** why do i always have to come back to this bullshit on a daily basis?

**Morticia Addams:** You’re the one who continues to associate with us.

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** valid point, thank you.

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** anyway, i have an announcement.

**irl regina george:** oh???

**NERD!!:** is it about shadow the hedgehog being a bitch ass motherfucker

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** sou.

**irl damian hubbard:** HE PISSED ON MY FUCKING WIFE

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** alright fine i won’t tell you.

**irl regina george:** SUZUHIKO SHUT THE FUCK UP

**irl regina george:** okay, tell us

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** thank you.

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** okay.

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** i’m dating makoto naegi.

**irl regina george:** FINALLY

**irl regina george:** I’VE BEEN WAITING YEARS FOR THIS SHIT

**cookin’ by the book:** who dat

**Doctor Stranger:** I’m pulling up his files now.

**irl damian hubbard:** no fair i was gonna do that

**Doctor Stranger: **Be faster next time.

**Doctor Stranger:** Anyway, he’s some tiny clumsy looking motherfucker.

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** i should disagree and try to defend him, but.

**Doctor Stranger:** You picked him.

**Morticia Addams:** That doesn’t give you the right to insult him, asshole.

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** exactly, thank you daina.

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** i didn’t insult kensuke, don’t insult makoto.

**Doctor Stranger:** Do not bring Kensuke into this.

**sew me:** then do not be a little bitch.

**sew me:** byakuya, my condolences on your relationship with this clumsy shrimp

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** i

**Actually Five Hargreeves: **thank you, haruka.

**irl damian hubbard:** tell him if he hurts you, i’ll bust a cap in his ass

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** i am not going to say anything of the sort, thank you.

**irl damian hubbard:** fine i’ll do it myself

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** no, don’t do that.

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** suzuhiko.

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** Suzuhiko.

**Morticia Addams:** Oh, god, here we go.

**on your left:** is it too late to offer congrats??

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** of course not.

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** thank you, akira.

**on your left:** you’re welcome :)

* * *

**Direct Message Between ** ** _egg boy _ ** **and ** ** _Actually Five Hargreeves_****.**

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** if someone named irl damian hubbard contacts you, ignore them.

**egg boy:** why

**egg boy:** are they dangerous

**_Actually Five Hargreeves_** **shared a picture.**

**egg boy:** oh

* * *

**[****irl damian hubbard:** If you hurt Byakuya, I’ll bust a cap in your ass, Naegi.**]**

**_egg boy_** **accepted your direct message request!**

**egg boy:** hey! togami suzuhiko, right??

**egg boy: **i was told to ignore this, sorry

**irl damian hubbard:** wow

**irl damian hubbard:** i just threatened you, and you’re apologizing to me??

**egg boy:** yes??

**irl damian hubbard:** damn.

**irl damian hubbard:** hey kid, if you ever have any trouble in the future, hmu

**egg boy:** okay??

* * *

**Direct Message Between ****_Actually Five Hargreeves_** **and ****_irl damian hubbard_****.**

**_irl damian hubbard_** **shared a picture.**

**irl damian hubbard: **holy shit???

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** christ, i told him to ignore you.

**irl damian hubbard:** he’s so polite what the fuck

**irl damian hubbard:** marry this kid, kuya

**Actually Five Hargreeves:** Suzuhiko, I Will Pay You To Stop Talking.


	6. not a chapter, whoops

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> just a date/time check, lmao

hi!! i'm a stupid idiot, and decided after the fact that i want this shit to have chronological stuffs, so yeah, let's backtrack real quick and figure out times and dates, whoo-hoo!!

so this fic started on saturday, sept. 14, 2019(i know, we are backtracking a lot with this fic, i'm a lazy bitch, that's on me). so yeah, chapter 1 starts at 8 am on saturday, sept. 14, 2019.

chapter 2 is 12:30ish pm on sunday, sept. 15, 2019. chapter 3 is on the same day, with the first segment taking place from 9:50 pm to 10:20 pm, and the second segment from 10:30 pm to like just before 11 pm.

chapter 4 is two days after this, tuesday, sept. 17, 2019 at an after school time(3:50 pm or 4:30 pm, take your pick). it's just to establish that the sdr2 kiddos are also here, so time for this one ain't that important.

chapter 5 is another two-day skip, on thursday, sept. 19, 2019. the first segment is before school starts, at 7:20 am. the rest of the chapter takes place at 5:20 pm and stops around 6 pm.

so, there. we have a canon timeline now. probably the only canon thing about this fic. i know y'all are probably eagerly awaiting the next chapter, and i promise i am working on it. i just started college a week ago, so you'll have to bear with me. thank you for being patient regardless.

also, be on the lookout for an upcoming project of mine. it's for the danganronpa fandom, and it's pretty big. feel free to message me about it if you'd like. i'll leave my handles in the notes of this non-chapter for anyone interested.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> discord - mrs. saxobeat#2016  
insta - lonerubyreader

**Author's Note:**

> when your friend doesn't sleep, so you accuse him of being a vampire


End file.
